网站首页 > 英语作文万能句子 > 查看内容

高考英语满分作文名师点评(5)

2017-11-23 14:20发布者:土木文化查看:1174评论:200

摘要:假设你是红星中学高三一班的学生李华,为校刊英语园地写一篇题为“Our Spring Outing” 的英文稿件。 请根据以下四幅图的先后顺序,叙述上周你们班从准备春游到春游结束的完整过程。

【北京卷】

【试题回放】假设你是红星中学高三一班的学生李华,为校刊英语园地写一篇题为“Our Spring Outing” 的英文稿件。 请根据以下四幅图的先后顺序,叙述上周你们班从准备春游到春游结束的完整过程。

注意: 词数不少于60.

提示词: 游乐园amusement park 垃圾箱bin

Last Thursday, we had a class meeting to discuss where to go for our spring outing. We came up with several choices such as going boating, climbing a mountain, and going to an amusement park. Finally, we decided to go mountain climbing.

The next day, we set off early in the morning. While climbing the mountain, we enjoyed the warm sunshine and a beautiful view . However, when we reached the top, we were shocked to see litter here and there, such as bottles and banana peels. Then we started to pick up the litter and put the rubbish into the nearby recycling bin and non-recycling bin respectively.

We were tired but happy.

【名师点评】

本情景作文的内容要点如下:1.讨论;2.爬山;3.检拾别人的垃圾;4.投放垃圾。内容要点可用不同方式表达。本文覆盖了所有内容要点,较好地完成了试题规定的任务。其中,写作主题突出,详略得当,应用了较多的语法结构和词汇,而且有效的使用了语句间的连接成分,使全文机构紧凑。本文叙述清楚,描写细致,准确运用了很多富有表现力的词和句型,例如:“set off early”,“enjoyed the warm sunshine and a beautiful view”, ”were shocked to see litter here and there “等,将活动的情形很形象地描述了出来。

积累卡片英汉互译

好词1 set off 出发2. litter n.废弃物3.respectively adv.分别地

好句1.While climbing the mountain, we enjoyed the warm sunshine and a beautiful view .

在爬山时,我们享受着温暖的阳光和美丽的风景。

1. However, when we reached the top, we were shocked to see litter here and there, such as bottles and banana peels.

然而,当我们登上山顶,被眼前的一幕惊呆了:瓶子和香蕉皮这样的废弃物到处都是。

评析:细节描写,生动形象。“shock”一词也用得生动传神。


上一篇:高考英语满分作文名师点评(4)

下一篇:2016高考英语满分作文(新课标2)